文化冲击3
Second thing is control.
Chinese parents role rather like a god to their child but friend. I hate it at the beginning so I never do that to my child. But it is quite common in Chinese traditional culture that children should unconditionally obey their parents order. That is the spirit of “孝顺”.
Now I know “孝顺” is a bullshit. It bend the relationship between child and parent and hurt them both. This kind of symbiosis is insane. But I believe most Chinese still think it is a good thing nowadays. Parent may think they control their children for children’s benefit. It is correct if he is under 3 years old. But most parent may used to the same way they control their kid even if the kid has already grow up. For me, I saw my parents in law always suggest my wife she should wear more or less, she should carry an umbrella, she should eat one more bowl of rice. And what make me can not understand is she never fight back and sometimes she seems appreciate it!
Yes, that is quite common in China. Parents control their adult children. That’s why we have so many conflicting between the generations. I saw seldom parents can control themselves not to cross the boundary. But I think my parents did pretty good. That why I am quit clear where the boundary is and can not stand anyone break into my territory.
